Cowboy Commandments


#1

People here in Texas have trouble with all those shalls and shall nots in the 10 Commandments. Folks here just aren’t used to talking in those terms.So, some Texicans got together and translated the King James Good Book into

“King Ranch” language: Ten Commandments, Cowboy Style.

Cowboy’s Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie, Texas.

(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin’.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin’ before God.
(6) No foolin’ around with another fellow’s gal.
(7) No killin’.
(8) Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don’t take what ain’t yers.
10) Don’t be hankerin’ for yer buddy’s stuff.

Now that’s kinda plain an simple don’t ya think?

Y’all have a good Day.

If you can read this, thank a TEACHER
If you can read this in English, thank a SOLDIER


#2

Haha…all throughout me reading that i kept thinking about Cletus the Slack Jawed Yokel from the Simpsons hahaha


#3

Another reason why I wish Texas would secede, not to mention Texas contains 6 of the fatest cities in America. Sorry Mexico, you can have it back! :rock I guess I can’t take a joke? Not to provoke anything, but do ever not relate things to religion?


#4

[quote=CareBear3030]People here in Texas have trouble with all those shalls and shall nots in the 10 Commandments. Folks here just aren’t used to talking in those terms.So, some Texicans got together and translated the King James Good Book into

“King Ranch” language: Ten Commandments, Cowboy Style.

Cowboy’s Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie, Texas.

(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin’.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin’ before God.
(6) No foolin’ around with another fellow’s gal.
(7) No killin’.
(8) Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don’t take what ain’t yers.
10) Don’t be hankerin’ for yer buddy’s stuff.

Now that’s kinda plain an simple don’t ya think?

Y’all have a good Day.

If you can read this, thank a TEACHER
If you can read this in English, thank a SOLDIER[/quote]

Lol, that’s funny. Theres alot of rednecks around here that talk like that.


#5

They also end each sentence with “boy”…

…Like “Git your garn darnit varmith skins off my here property boy”…Yosemite Sam? :dunno


#6

Are you really a Texan ???Cause this little redneck, coon ass was born and raised here in Texas sssssssooooooooo :smiley:


#7

whats a “coon ass” Jan?


#8

Really Mikey you dont know :lol :lol


#9

whats a “coon ass” Jan?[/quote]

I’ma guess’n a person that even Rednecks make fun of. :wtf


#10

whats a “coon ass” Jan?[/quote]

I’ma guess’n a person that even Rednecks make fun of. :wtf[/quote]

hay Boozie would you like this little Red neck to KICK your Butt :banana :banana :banana :smiley:


#11

Wow…who removed your funny bone??? It was an email I received…a JOKE!!! Hahahahaha…right???


#12

Heres another joke…not religion related.

The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert.
After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.
Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says,
“Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?”
The Lone Ranger replies, “I see millions of stars.”
“What that tell you?” asked Tonto.
The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says,
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions
of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter

past three in the morning. Theologically, it’s
evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small
and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems
we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What’s it tell you, Tonto?"
Tonto is silent for a moment, then says,
“Kemo Sabe, you dumber then buffalo pie.
Someone has stolen tent.”


#13

I guess!!!


#14

whats a “coon ass” Jan?[/quote]

I’ma guess’n a person that even Rednecks make fun of. :wtf[/quote]

hay Boozie would you like this little Red neck to KICK your Butt :banana :banana :banana :D[/quote]

:think Ummm… http://www.offtopicz.com/forums/smilies_mod/upload/1a1ea7411eba8ab2b584fa7245d58b90.gif OK. giggles


#15

[quote=CareBear3030]Tonto is silent for a moment, then says,
“Kemo Sabe, you dumber then buffalo pie.
Someone has stolen tent.”[/quote]

:lol :lol :lol

I didn’t even catch that one. Tonto > Intruder too.


#16

whats a “coon ass” Jan?[/quote]

I’ma guess’n a person that even Rednecks make fun of. :wtf[/quote]

hay Boozie would you like this little Red neck to KICK your Butt :banana :banana :banana :D[/quote]

:think Ummm… http://www.offtopicz.com/forums/smilies_mod/upload/1a1ea7411eba8ab2b584fa7245d58b90.gif OK. giggles[/quote]

HUm what did you say :lol :lol oh and i have a funny bone but not at my Home expence >>>>>> i dont care for making fun of people homes and since your a newbie maybe you should know that