are you seriously mentally incapacitated and not understand the sentence at hand?
= It is my wish that
"IF YOU'RE EVER"
= If it happens. Intention neutral, no wish.
"A VICTIM OF CRIME"
= A receiver of intended criminal damage
"NO ONE WILL COME AND SNITCH UP"
= Nobody will reveal the background or the attackers
"SINCE CLEARLY YOU CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO"
= Lake cannot be bothered to report federal crime
Let's put that together
"It is my wish that, if it happens that you are a receiver of intended criminal damage, nobody will reveal the background or the attackers, since you cannot be bothered to report federal crime yourself."
Alternatively shorted to "I hope you're a victim of karma"
I hope I helped.
And go to a fucking school.