Ex

Okay. I have another problem that i want to share with you guys.

I have been with this girl for three years. The three years of our relationship was not as smooth sailing, we argue most of the time, break up and get back together. It was a heartache for me as well as her. So she decided she wanted to end the relationship for good. I did not concur with her, but in the goodness of my heart i let her go. I still love her… i never got over her, and i know she likes me too.

We have been separated for about a year and couple months now. I was at the supermarket the other day and she saw me, and waved. I made a little nod to her. We did not have a conversation. Two weeks after she called me (I was surprise that she still have my number after so long) and say she wanted to say hi to me? We where talking for quite a long while over the phone, catching up… she ask me about my life, she told me she is not seeing anyone. How do one interpret that?

After all that, old feelings have stirred up, and i am wondering if i should pick things back up with her. What do you guys think?

It sounds like it was a fiery relationship.

I don’t really do those so not the best person to answer!! Wouldn’t you want to be with someone that you can have an easier life with whilst still having all that HAWTNESS!!

if u think its worth it then yea… if u think it will be more heart ache… let it go… but remeber there was a reason u split up

first of all, aren’t you only 15 or so? Because your age will definitely change my answers

:homo:

Have you changed? Has she? If the answer is no, then I would expect more of the same problems you had before, once the thrill of getting back together is over.

Have you changed? Has she? If the answer is no, then I would expect more of the same problems you had before, once the thrill of getting back together is over.[/quote]

Exactly.

If you kept breaking up, it was for a reason. I’ve been in two relationships like this, and both were toxic. No good… no good at all.

19, 20 in 5 months.

[quote=“satinbutterfly, post: 1103016”]Exactly.

If you kept breaking up, it was for a reason. I’ve been in two relationships like this, and both were toxic. No good… no good at all.[/quote]

Yeah, I wasn’t pulling this advice out of my butt either :smiley:

On and off for 7 years - I was a glutton for punishment, and so was she :frowning:

Actually,this is something that i am giving careful consideration into… if we finally agree on getting back together, will it be the same thing… the arguments, the break ups and all that. That is why i did not put that agreement to her already, of getting back together. i don’t want to be setting myself up for hurt again man.

[quote=“canidae, post: 1103018”]Yeah, I wasn’t pulling this advice out of my butt either :smiley:

On and off for 7 years - I was a glutton for punishment, and so was she :([/quote]

Yes… I did a 3 year and a 2 year stint… I’m very stubborn, and that’s not always in a good way. :thumbdown

you’re only 19 so go for it…give her a ring and ask her out see how it goes…not like you are going to marry her.

Maybe try hanging out as just friends for a while - no strings . . . see how it goes. You might naturally get closer that way

Your still young… but as your life moves on, you both change… It may work better now since yall are both more mature. You can always test it out and see how it goes… If its the same ole, then tell her its better yall are friends.

that is a good idea Canidae. But how do i approach the situation? I mean, i want to go out as friends, but i don’t want to call her and say, hey lets go out as friends and see where it gets us… because if she still have some bad habits in her she would cover it up. And then again, i don’t want her think by asking her out i want to get back together with her yet. People can be pretentious, and cover up who they really are.

I have changed, and i want to know if she has changed too.

[quote=“StanJon, post: 1103024”]that is a good idea Canidae. But how do i approach the situation? I mean, i want to go out as friends, but i don’t want to call her and say, hey lets go out as friends and see where it gets us… because if she still have some bad habits in her she would cover it up. And then again, i don’t want her think by asking her out i want to get back together with her yet. People can be pretentious, and cover up who they really are.

I have changed, and i want to know if she has changed too.[/quote]

One step at a time. Call and see if she’s interested in going out to do something rather simple. It doesn’t really matter at this point what she’s thinking or what she’s going to do. All that matters is how you are going to deal with the situation. I know this is WAY easier said than done, but go into this with a “whatever” attitude. Get to the point where you can take it or leave it. She wants to go out, fine. She doesn’t, fine, She’s playing her old games, fine. She wants to be genuine, fine. Whatever, it makes no difference - you’re cool with anything that happens. The trick here is you actually have to be cool with whatever happens for real - it can’t be a game. Again, far easier said than done.

Thanks man for the words of advice. And the Boss lady too. You guys are awesome. I will try and see where it gets me. :thumbup

Good luck, and I hope things work out for the best :thumbup

Get together a group of friends and invite her to join a night out to do something as a group. In the group dynamic no pressure if it feels right then go from there. Since she made the first move she is interested.

Maybe you both grew up a bit more and learned something in the last year or so… :wink:

With age comes wisdom.