Letter to santa


#1

Go here: http://members.aol.com/frogiearno/dearsanta.htm to create your own. here is my letter:

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Mrs behavin’s Office party. It was carebear3030 who spiked the punch with too much Smirdoff. I can’t help it if I drank 3 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like scent.

I thought it was funny when I put project mayhem’s shirt on my head and danced the salsa on the bed while singing `my humps’. I didn’t mean to break Mrs behavin’s PDA and don’t know why Mrs behavin would accuse me of murder.

I don’t remember calling Bossman351’s wife a big Cow—even though she looked like one with red eye shadow and blue lipstick!

And when I threw up on Julie’s husband’s breasts, it was only because I ate too much of that strawberrys.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my mustang through my neighbor’s bathroom. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a small dog and have me arrested for robbery!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all gigantic and dirty. And I’m really not to blame for any of this sexy stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and to jump yours,
Veronica (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It’s only 5 bucks!


#2

That was too much fun!! I loved it. Heres mine:

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at vshayes’s Office party. It was uncle bacon who spiked the punch with too much vodka. I can’t help it if I drank 7 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like cinammon.

I thought it was funny when I put redsMULLT1’s bra on my head and danced the chicken on the computer desk while singing `If you like Pina Coladas’. I didn’t mean to break vshayes’s cell phone and don’t know why vshayes would accuse me of robbery.

I don’t remember calling Bossman’s wife a gigantic chicken—even though she looked like one with purple eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Bossman’s husband’s buttcheeks, it was only because I ate too much of that spaghetti.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Durango through my neighbor’s bathroom. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a tiny elephant and have me arrested for robbery!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all hairy and retarted. And I’m really not to blame for any of this small stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and carefully yours,
Amy (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It’s only 25 bucks!


#3

haha

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Joe’s Office party. It was Chris who spiked the punch with too much 151. I can’t help it if I drank 28 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like cinnamon.

I thought it was funny when I put Kevin’s boxers on my head and danced the macarana on the love seat while singing `breakdown’. I didn’t mean to break Joe’s vibrator and don’t know why Joe would accuse me of theft.

I don’t remember calling Greg’s wife a brown cow—even though she looked like one with pink eye shadow and blue lipstick!

And when I threw up on Veronica’s husband’s hooters, it was only because I ate too much of that carrot cake.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Ferrari through my neighbor’s living room. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a sucky donkey and have me arrested for theft!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all craptacular and stupid. And I’m really not to blame for any of this white stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and stupid yours,
James (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It’s only 71 bucks!


#4

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Joe’s Office party. It was James who spiked the punch with too much Jager Bomb. I can’t help it if I drank 67 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like sunshine dust.

I thought it was funny when I put Jack’s thong on my head and danced the tango on the couch while singing `Sometimes it Hurts’. I didn’t mean to break Joe’s x-box and don’t know why Joe would accuse me of streaking.

I don’t remember calling Joe’s wife a dumb bitch—even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on Veronica’s husband’s face, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my mustang through my neighbor’s living room. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a shithead motherfucker and have me arrested for drunk in public!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all shit faced and fucked up. And I’m really not to blame for any of this bullshit stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and damn it yours,
Chris (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It’s only 1 bucks!


#5

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Kristen’s Office party. It was Lauren who spiked the punch with too much Jager Bomb. I can’t help it if I drank 8 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like Vanilla.

I thought it was funny when I put Meaghan’s bra on my head and danced the the Carlton on the bed while singing `Every Time We Touch’. I didn’t mean to break Kristen’s vibrator and don’t know why Kristen would accuse me of prostitution.

I don’t remember calling John’s wife a happy pig—even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and black lipstick!

And when I threw up on Brandy’s husband’s elbow, it was only because I ate too much of that pasta.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Civic through my neighbor’s chimney. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a healthy dog and have me arrested for burlglary!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all dumb and horny. And I’m really not to blame for any of this colorful stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and quickly yours,
Heather (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It’s only 88 bucks!


#6

heres mine :smiley:

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Jeremie’s Office party. It was Chris who spiked the punch with too much Bud light. I can’t help it if I drank 50 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like citrus.

I thought it was funny when I put Amy’s Jock Strap on my head and danced the Happy jig on the Lazy Susan while singing `YMCA’. I didn’t mean to break Jeremie’s pube trimmer and don’t know why Jeremie would accuse me of sodomy.

I don’t remember calling Don’s wife a smooth Chicken—even though she looked like one with black eye shadow and blue lipstick!

And when I threw up on vshayes’s husband’s tater hole, it was only because I ate too much of that corn.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Pinto through my neighbor’s Attic. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a dusty mongoose and have me arrested for Public intox!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all greasy and slimy. And I’m really not to blame for any of this wrinkled stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and slyly yours,
Bossman (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It’s only 972354 bucks!

Oh yeah, sorry bout the whole taterhole thing Joe. You know Bossman+ :booze = :tard :smiley:


#7

well, i just used a couple of ya’lls names from the site i hope you don’t mind :slight_smile:

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at AtlanticBlue99’s Office party. It was Uncle Bacon who spiked the punch with too much Vodka. I can’t help it if I drank 8 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like kiwi.

I thought it was funny when I put Haus’s pants on my head and danced the twist on the couch while singing `Wild Thang’. I didn’t mean to break AtlanticBlue99’s cell phone and don’t know why AtlanticBlue99 would accuse me of arson.

I don’t remember calling mdvaldosta’s wife a funky chicken—even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and green lipstick!

And when I threw up on vshayes’s husband’s arm, it was only because I ate too much of that pizza.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my BMW through my neighbor’s patio. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a slow giraffe and have me arrested for embezzle!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all pink and large. And I’m really not to blame for any of this small stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and very yours,
Heather (Really a nice girl!)

P.S. It’s only 80 bucks!


#8

looks like I’m spiking everyones punch :wtf


#9

Re: RE: letter to santa

at least you’re not sitting in jail “dumb and horny” :wtf


#10

I’m just horny


#11

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at unclebacon’s Office party. It was atlaticblue99 who spiked the punch with too much lemon vodka. I can’t help it if I drank 512.215 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like last weeks throw-up.

I thought it was funny when I put mrs behavin’s gstring on my head and danced the kooala on the stool while singing `candy shop’. I didn’t mean to break unclebacon’s amplifier and don’t know why unclebacon would accuse me of shopplifting.

I don’t remember calling vshayes’s wife a fluffy wildcat—even though she looked like one with green eye shadow and yellow lipstick!

And when I threw up on recklesstim’s husband’s face, it was only because I ate too much of that jello.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my porsche through my neighbor’s porch. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a lost tiger and have me arrested for grand theft auto!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all drunk and loud. And I’m really not to blame for any of this bitchy stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and fuck yours,
lemon (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It’s only 5498731204587166548 bucks!


#12

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Kitty’s Office party. It was Red who spiked the punch with too much Milk. I can’t help it if I drank 4 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like gas.

I thought it was funny when I put SI’s shirt on my head and danced the moonwalk on the chair while singing `Beat it’. I didn’t mean to break Kitty’s CD player and don’t know why Kitty would accuse me of speeding.

I don’t remember calling MD’s wife a dumb Horse—even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and red lipstick!

And when I threw up on V’s husband’s Dick, it was only because I ate too much of that cake.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Mustang through my neighbor’s roof. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a black cow and have me arrested for stealing!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all gold and big. And I’m really not to blame for any of this old stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and hump yours,
Horseshoeing (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It’s only 85 bucks!


#13

Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good Boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Kitty’s Office party. It was Horsey who spiked the punch with too much Bud Light. I can’t help it if I drank 262 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like Fart.

I thought it was funny when I put Cindic’s Edible Panties on my head and danced the The bird on the Entertainment Center while singing `Stroke Me’. I didn’t mean to break Kitty’s Dildo and don’t know why Kitty would accuse me of Phornication.

I don’t remember calling Jaime’s wife a Short Pig—even though she looked like one with Pink eye shadow and Blue lipstick!

And when I threw up on Jayme’s husband’s Clit, it was only because I ate too much of that Tuna Fish.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Mustang GT through my neighbor’s Ceiling. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a Long Horse and have me arrested for Beastiality!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all Wet and Dry. And I’m really not to blame for any of this Soaked stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and Completely yours,
RedStangGT (Really a nice Boy!)

P.S. It’s only 7 bucks!

Frogie’s Website


#14

Creamy and sticky Huh :hump


#15

Re: RE: letter to santa

[quote=horseshoeing]Santa Claus
North Pole, Earth

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn’t my fault what happened at Kitty’s Office party. It was Red who spiked the punch with too much Milk. I can’t help it if I drank 4 glasses. It was so good—smelled and tasted just like gas.

I thought it was funny when I put SI’s shirt on my head and danced the moonwalk on the chair while singing `Beat it’. I didn’t mean to break Kitty’s CD player and don’t know why Kitty would accuse me of speeding.

I don’t remember calling MD’s wife a dumb Horse—even though she looked like one with blue eye shadow and red lipstick!

And when I threw up on V’s husband’s Dick, it was only because I ate too much of that cake.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my Mustang through my neighbor’s roof. I don’t think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a black cow and have me arrested for stealing!

So, Santa…here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all gold and big. And I’m really not to blame for any of this old stuff. Please bring me what I want the most—bail money!

Sincerely and hump yours,
Horseshoeing (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It’s only 85 bucks![/quote]

WTF


#16

:funnah :funnah :funnah I didnt even read it. I just posted it.