Hey @throughtheprism ,
Lemme tell you, some nights during boot camp were the worst in my life. Not because of the yelling and screaming and PT and pressure etc, but because of how much it hurt to be away from everybody I ever knew. I'm at home right now but, looking back, I didn't think I'd still be in the military. Really wanted to run out the gate and go be with those I love, yet, here I am s***posting from a government laptop.
I wish I could go into detail but by virtue of my political beliefs I would have no possibilities for a career or in higher education if my identity was revealed. All I'm really hitting at, though, is that the bad times never last if you are strong. Doesn't matter how lonely it is in your hotel room. Believe me, I know the feel; when you throw up violently and they put you in sick bay for 24hrs and all you can do is sit and think about what memories you could be having with those you love instead of the suck. Even now when I go back to the military I won't be doing anything on the weekends. Just sitting and thinking and s***posting. No family nearby, nowhere to go, nothing to see. It blows beyond imagination to be away but sometimes we have to do that in life. I don't know your circumstances but just know when you're sitting back in 10 years with a family and getting ready/ already have moved closer to home the bad times will be over. Now's the biggest struggle of our lives, during these formative adult years. Make the best of it and come out alive. One day you will have to stand strong yourself for those you love going through the same, and they will need you around to survive. Hope I helped friend.